With the intensive day of money matters we had yesterday, it's no wonder I woke up early, my mind stirring with visions of dollarsigns dancing through my mind. I was thinking of various bank-related options, accounts to close, money to transfer, etc. What we're doing, I think, (today's at least), is changing all our accounts and cards to joint accounts, and progressing from there, seeing what the best way is to deal with our money, our debt and our investments. It's not a straight or immediate amalgam of our resources but it's the next step to geting there.
Aden and I aren't secretive, we share pretty much everything with each other, so we're not worried about sharing our money. I think where the hesitation comes is a sense of individuality. We don't smother each other, but at the same time I think having her money and my money is one way of maintaining a sense of independence, of making decisions on our own. I don't know if that's good or bad, what works for one doesn't necessarily work for another. A friend who has done a hearty dose of financial planning courses took to heart a statement from her advisor that what works is different for everyone. The "smart" way might be to stop putting money in savings and put everything towards debt, with the thought that since interest is more expensive than any investment return you might be making (18% versus, say, 4%). But for some people, they may feel that they must be putting some money away. Psychology of investing and money management will be different for everyone, but the important thing is that it's all being addressed. The same thing can be said about how couples deal with their money, some people are comfortable with pooling, others with individual accounts and others with a mix of all.
We're still trying to establish what we're comfortable with, but we're working on figuring it out. Maybe one pool of money would be simpler, but at the same time you can't escape monitoring each other's spending habits, and we haven't decided if we're happy with that or not. It's not that we need secrets, however, without some sense of private funds, how can we surprise one another with things? All very strange concerns, but we're going to try a few things and see how they work out.